Let Jeremy Hill Show You How To Trash Talk The Wrong Way

Last night, Thursday, November 6th, 2014, an NFL game was played between the Cleveland Browns and Cincinnati Bengals. The Browns came into Cincy and beat the Bengals 24 – 3. It was a rout in every sense. Yet, there was one Bengals' player who failed to see that.
Rookie running back Jeremy Hill was asked after the game if the Browns were better than he had thought. His direct quote is, “Oh, no, not at all. They’re probably worse than I thought, to be honest with you.” To be honest with you Mr. Hill, you’re an idiot.
Hill wasn’t done, however, and continued his mini temper tantrum, “They didn’t do anything special to me. I mean, respect to them, they won the game. But that’s all I’ll give them.” Sounds like someone didn’t get to go for ice cream after the game because he didn’t win. BOO HOO… (Read that again but in a high pitched sarcastic voice, because that’s how I would say it to his face, and it’s way better)
I’m sure the Browns organization will be happy to have your respect, since they just served you a can of whoop-ass in your own house, and got their first road victory in the division after 17 consecutive losses. Plus, now you have to go to Cleveland and face them again on Sunday, December 14th. And how do you think the city of Cleveland will respond to you? Hopefully, in the best way the people of Cleveland can: Bottles in snowballs, batteries in snowballs, and bottles and batteries by themselves. By no means do I wish harm upon Mr. Hill. But, if he was struck by a flying object I would understand why.
If you thought this in-state rivalry was bad, Mr. Hill, just wait until the Browns defense puts your words up in their locker room to stare at from now until you come in to their home. I would keep my helmet on extra tight Mr. Hill, because you're going to have 11 guys looking to take it off for you. And not in a nice way, in a take-Jeremy-Hill's-helmet-off-with-his-head-still-inside-it kinda way. You know, the traditional Cleveland greeting.
This whole “trash talk” episode by an immature rookie who has no idea how to handle himself in a loss, is great because it just makes no sense (Just like the 77% graduation rate of LSU football players makes no sense. We know football is the only thing they go there for, and LSU is not known as the “Harvard of the South.” I’m just waiting for the fake classes and tutoring scandal to break).  Jeremy Hill got destroyed by the Browns. He was only able to produce 55 yards on 12 carries. The Bengals as a team were held to under 200 yards of offense. Hell, this whole season Mr. Hill is only averaging 45 yards and less than half a touchdown per game. What an All-Pro selection!
Now, granted, Mr. Hill just came off of his best performance ever last week where he rushed for 154 yards and two touchdowns. But it was against the Jacksonville Jaguars, the worst team in the NFL. So his “career performance” is about as awesome as me getting into a Pop Warner game as a 31 year-old with athletic ability and having the same stats. And it’s just as embarrassing to admit that accomplishment with a straight face. Actually I bet that I could even run for 150 yards a two touchdowns against the Jags. I’m not willing to try it, but in my mind I could…Or on Madden. I’ll just get that accomplishment on Madden.
Trash talk like this, after you get worked over in front of your home crowd, is borderline psychotic behavior. Just picture this; if you were to get knocked out in one punch in a fight you instigated against someone you thought was an easy opponent, would you wake-up in the hospital and think to yourself, “that guy was way worse than I thought”? NO! You would feel like a damn moron because you were trash talking that guy behind his back to all your buddies, and he didn’t even break a sweat as he punched a hole in your face that knocked out three teeth and broke your jaw. Yeah, you aren’t the one that may suck at life, it’s the guy with the deadly right hook that just made you eat out of a straw for the next four months.
Mr. Hill, if I may offer you some advice. The next time you get beat (and you will, you play for the Bengals), own up to your own suckage as well as your team's horrendus performance. And maybe, just maybe, keep your mouth shut until you have proven something in the league. Like maybe, more than 1 yard against the Patriots. Or, more than 36 yards in two games against your divisional rival Baltimore Ravens. Or, more than 15 yards against the Colts. I’m not saying you have to do better, I’m just saying it would help your case if you did some actual work for your team in games that matter.

You, Mr. Hill, are as of right now, a nobody. Granted, you are a nobody who makes more money in one game than I make in two years in my profession, but still a nobody. You may have been really cool at LSU, and gotten all the girls, and gotten some nerd tutor to do all your work for you. But you are now a very small fish in a very big pond. And you haven’t done anything. So shut up. Be a good athlete and put the blame on yourself for not running better against the “worst” team you have ever played. And talk again when you can show that a) you can run on premier defenses, and b) know when the appropriate time for trash talking is. Just a heads up, trash talking doesn’t happen after you don’t score a touchdown, your quarterback throws 3 picks, you only get 55 yards and then throw a hissy fit that would make a 5 year old think you were overreacting, and then say the team that stomped you up an down your own field are way worse than you first thought. That’s called bulletin board material for the Browns. Have fun in Cleveland in December! Idiot…

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